Monday, October 2, 2017

The Path to Fulfillment

Wouldn’t it be great if there was a “how-to” manual for life?
How to Be Successful, Rich, and Live Happily Ever After. How to Find the Perfect Mate. How to Have the Perfect Marriage. How to Raise Your Kids to be Healthy, Wealthy, and Wise. How to Find Happiness and Lasting Fulfillment. And if there were such manuals, would everyone follow them? Not likely. 

Unfortunately, no such manuals exist. But fortunately, there are those who have traveled the road before you who can offer some insight to living a better life. All you have to do is consider their insight as you go about creating the life you desire.

Most people believe they’ll find fulfillment as they begin reaching certain milestones: getting married, having kids, buying a house, getting a car, reaching a specific salary level in their business or career.


To some extent, there is a certain amount of fulfillment associated with the various milestones of life, but to be clear, true happiness doesn’t come from money, things, or success. I have known several people who have achieved more success and accumulated more wealth than you can possibly imagine that were unfulfilled despite their perceived advantage. 

Personal fulfillment is a fundamental desire of most everyone. But before fulfillment can be realized to any great extent, you must first establish a sense of self-confidence to believe you can, in fact, find and experience fulfillment. Once self-confidence and self-esteem are established, you’ll need a challenge or a cause to feel satisfied―a way to express your individuality and contribution to the world and, just as importantly, to yourself.


Instead of pursuing the elusive trappings of life, why not make it a goal to pursue the experiences of a fulfilled life? Experiences are the most notable, yet often overlooked, aspects of a life that is not dependent or encumbered by income, status, acceptance, or possessions. 

So, what’s the secret? How can you find fulfillment and how can you begin living a fulfilled life? Everyone is different of course, but there are common strategies that can lead you to your unique goal of personal fulfillment. I often tell people that they can have, be, do, or become anything in life they desire with one simple method―Ask! With that in mind, here are four key questions to ask yourself as you consider the many ways in which you can discover your own fulfilled life. 

1. What are some of the most memorable experiences of your childhood? What activities did you find most fulfilling?

Yup, we went there―your childhood. I try not to play the role of a psychologist when I can avoid it, but it only makes sense that a lot of our psychological and emotional influences are connected to our initial (childhood) programming. 

If you think about it, the things you enjoyed as a child gave you the most fulfillment and managed to keep your interest for a time. Your experiences shaped you. If you didn’t care for something you likely had little patience for it and don’t remember much of the experience, aside from perhaps a dislike of the activity or experience.


Therefore, it only makes sense that your most influential programming came from your most influential (and memorable) experiences. These experiences made an impression on you and will always play a role in the perceptions you have of the world. While most of us “grew up” and found new interests, there are those among us that remain closely connected to the passions that continue to bring a great deal of personal fulfillment. 




So, take some time to reflect on the things you enjoyed as you were growing up. As you do, pay close attention to the way you feel as the memories of your youthful programming come to life. Your feelings provide insight to the programming that is intimately connected to your emotional center. As the memories become increasingly clear to you, be sure to hone in on those that resonate the most. Any manner of positive emotional “stir” is a pretty good clue that you’re beginning to rediscover the pathway to your source of fulfillment. 


As you continue to gain clarity on the elements of your fulfillment, make a list of everything that elicits a positive emotion, no matter how insignificant it may seem at first. Maybe it’s sports, music, a particular activity, topic, or interest. Once you have a list, start small and take action by reengaging in some of the very things that are connected to your list. By the way, you're never too old.


Once you rediscover your emotional connections, look for a way to use your passions and interests to enrich your life and the lives of others. In other words, do something about it. 
And keep in mind that your interest doesn’t have to be connected to financial gain. As I initially explained at the outset of this article, the best reward of personal fulfillment is intrinsic. And you can take that to the emotional bank! That’s not to say, however, that your fulfillment cannot bring you overwhelming abundance. Some of the happiest and most fulfilled people I know are operating squarely in their lane of passion while making a very good standard of living. The key with these people is in the value they bring to others through their personal fulfillment sources. 

2. What are your core values and beliefs?

It sounds like a simple question, but it’s far from simple. Your values and beliefs are driven by the perceptions you have of the world. Your perceptions are formed by the encounters and life experiences you have had that have become an integral part of your psychological programming. As I have said many times before, the good news is that you can re-write that program anytime you like. 

You have a choice. You can accept certain values simply because you’ve been programmed on their importance, or you can form new values and beliefs based on a determination to evolve beyond where you are into a new life where you value new ideals. That ideal mate, for example, may cripple your heart and soul because they are not the right match for you. The neighborhood you desire to become a part of may not be the one that truly feeds your happiness and contentment. The secret is to stop waiting for external factors to bring you fulfillment. 

So, go back to your list and write down the values that are important to you. For example, some people value integrity, friendship, loyalty, and faith while others value humor, compassion, patience, or spontaneity. Rank each value on a scale of 1 to 10, from the most important to the least. By the way, almost all values are good, but understanding which is most important to you will help you understand what will bring meaning to your life. The biggest mistake you can make at this point is to consider how other people will feel. This is not a time to look at things from the outside-in, but rather a time for inward reflection. Once you have “you” right, then you will become a much more powerful influence on the lives of others according to your standards, values, and tolerances. 

Consider taking on an activity that neutralizes, minimizes, or constrains the distractions, such as meditation, yoga or even a more dramatic activity that forces you to focus on the one thing you’re doing at the moment. The objective here is to step away, as much as possible, from your customary comfort zone, so that the roles you typically play are stripped away. 


A sole reliance on your own initiative to survive and thrive is transformative. Patience is the watchword here as these things can take time to develop. But collectively and cumulatively, these experiences will produce a spark that will ignite a brand new process of introspect and personal growth, eventually leading to clarity that will emerge from the process.


3. What goals should you set for yourself?

Take stock of each segment of your life and make a note of what you visualize as the ultimate goal in each area. Include your career, family, health, relationships, spirituality, and travel desires. Ask yourself: What does my best health look like? Who are the people I most want to spend time with? What do I want to change most? Where does my true contentment lie? Where can I make the most significant impact? 

Write down your goals and make a habit of visualizing each one on a daily basis. Make it “you-centric”.  You, running a marathon; you being in top physical shape; you leading others to a better life; you and your family enjoying dinner together; you and your partner building a home for the needy or embarking on a mission trip to an underdeveloped country. Whatever it is you see that connects you with happiness and contentment should be considered as a possible path to fulfillment. 



“If you don’t set your own goals, you will end up living someone else’s.” ~ G. Westfal


Your personal fulfillment is intimately connected to the contentment you feel and the worth you assign to the value of your life. If you’re unhappy or discontent, something is missing or out of sync. Don’t be afraid to identify it and do something about, even if you take just a few small steps at first. Some movement is better than no movement at all. 

4. What is your legacy?

The lasting impression you make on the lives of others supports your legacy. Your legacy has less to do with the physical things you leave behind as an inheritance and more with what you do during your life to positively affect the lives of others. So, to gain insight on the impact of your legacy, you should start by asking yourself how you would like to be remembered by those whose lives you have touched. As you think about the description of your legacy you should evaluate whether or not you are already doing something to contribute to that legacy. If so, great! If not…well, you already know what your next move should be. 


The unfortunate truth is that there is a great majority of people who are likely to describe their life as unfulfilled. It doesn’t have to be that way. Fulfillment can be found in so many ways. Consider asking yourself the questions that require you to be honestly accountable to the number one person who truly matters – You! Because, when you get you right, YOU will have the greatest impact on others and will ultimately find the fulfillment you seek. 

Until next time…

~ G ~


"It's never too late to be what you might have been" ~ George Eliot

-----------------------

Stay tuned for news on the release of ... 

333
The Power of Equilibrium


Coming this fall!

***********



Check out the wise, knowledgeable, and often entertaining perspectives of Author Elisabeth Auld inside the editions of

-------------------------------------------------------------



Get your copy of Gary's first novel Dream Operative, a #1 Amazon.com Best-Seller! NOW AVAILABLE on Audible.com!


FEAR Is a Thief is on Amazon.com and NOW AVAILABLE on Audible.com too! This inspiring book is the first in a self-empowerment series that was written to help people get past fear using five fundamental truths as a basis for understanding and taking action for a better life. Get your copy today at: FEAR Is a Thief/Amazon.


Also be sure to check out: KEY HORIZON, the second novel in the G. Weston spy series. This thriller is receiving rave reviews across the spectrum and has captivated a new following of "spy-fi" readers. 




Order your copy of these exciting novels today at Amazon.com.


Thursday, August 31, 2017

Subtle Significance

Imagine having the ability to completely transform your life from where you are today to where you want to be tomorrow and to know with certainty that the efforts you make will bring about the changes you desire. Since you’re already using that powerful imagination of yours, take it a step further and allow your mind to create a vision so compelling that the very thought begins to affect all of your senses. What do you see? What you smell? What do you hear, taste, and feel? Who are you with? How has it changed you? What second- and third-order effects has it had on your life and the lives of others? Use these powerful influencers to enhance what you see and to fuel your determined resolve to achieve your goals. 




“If you can hold it in your mind and in your heart, you can hold it in your hands.” ~ G. Westfal


If you allowed your imagination to lead you, as I suspect you did, then you have just demonstrated to yourself that you have the capacity and ability to achieve everything you just experienced. You commanded your mind to paint a picture for you and it responded without protest. And in so doing, you just laid down a new vision that will forever be a part of your subconscious programming. What you do from this point is completely up to you. In fact, at this point, the only thing keeping you from the changes you desire is the very thing you used to create your extraordinary vision—your imagination. 

All too often we place limits on the power of our imagination…by choice. We fail to realize just how much authority we have to choose, so we make default choices based on fear. A short-sighted vision convinces us that we have something to lose, so we hold back and make “safe” choices that prevent us from realizing the full experiences of life. We choose immediate gratification over sacrifice, apathy over effort, and caution over courage. And a great majority of people are OK with that process because it feels safe. Newsflash: safety is overrated and will prevent you from realizing your dreams, goals, hopes, and aspirations.


“Imagination is more important than knowledge.” ~ Albert Einstein


   Our achievements and the degree to which we are successful in reaching them are tied to the greatest power we have—our power of choice. We have a choice: Make short-term sacrifices for the sake of long-term gain, or take it easy, go with the flow, and do what most everyone else is doing to have what most everyone else has—which pretty much equates to mediocrity. That’s not where you are or you wouldn’t be reading this article.

     In over thirty years of studying the masters of success, I have found a few critical traits common among them all. These traits are not magical nor are they mythical. They are, however, significant in the difference they make in attracting the results most successful people get to experience in life while most others are left to wonder why they are so “unlucky”.  The significance is subtle, hence the reason I have coined the phrase subtle significance. Because subtlety is all it takes to realize a significant change in your life. Subtlety, by the way, does not always mean things will be easy. But the results will always be worth it.  

     Successful people are proactive and decisive. That is, they consciously and proactively choose good habits and rituals over a reactive life. They are driven by the passion they have for what they do. They are detail-oriented but not so much that they allow the details to distract or slow them down. And they don’t try to do everything but instead, do something—every day—that puts them at least one step closer to their desired goal or objective. 


“You can do anything when you quit trying to do everything.” ~ G. Westfal


      If we don’t learn good habits, life inherently becomes more difficult. However, not even all good habits are created equal. Some are more powerful than others and can be a difference-maker in terms of catapulting you toward your dreams, goals, aspirations, and objectives. Here are four subtle but powerful habits that are sure to help you to begin to see real results in your life. 

1. Make a Decision 

The one thing that will keep you from achieving a goal of any kind is indecision. The fact that you have made a conscious choice to read this article is highly relevant and speaks volumes to your resolve in making a decision to learn everything you can to create and develop the habits required of an achiever. 

     Once you make a decision, your primary responsibility at that point is to follow-through with action and consistency. If you have any desire whatsoever to go beyond ordinary and venture into the extraordinary, it will require your deepest resolve and commitment. But you must make a decision to actually do something about it by acting on your decision. And once you have taken action you must back it up with unrelenting consistency. Because without unrelenting consistency…You. Will. Fail.  

2. “D” is for Drive

To create a sense of certainty that you will indeed reach your objectives, you’ve got to develop your passion to a point that you feel incomplete without having done something to connect yourself with it on a daily basis. You’ve got to want it so bad that you can taste it, smell it, hear it, and see it. In other words, you must be so emotionally connected to it that you anticipate the work it will take to achieve it. Of course, if that already defines you, you are well on your way to realizing your objectives. And you have separated yourself from the ordinary dreamers who are still stuck in the game of hopes and wishes. 

     When your momentum takes a hit—and it will take a hit from time to time—dig your heels in and press through it. Recognize obstacles, frustrations, and circumstances for what they are and do not ever quit. Find ways around obstacles and circumstance. Find people who can help you through the tough times. Educate yourself to better handle these and similar situations when they arise again. And keep moving. When you do, you will experience growth. You will experience change. And you will begin to see life differently. People ask me all the time how I wrote two best-selling novels. I tell them I just did it…and never ever quit, even as the obstacles revealed themselves. Within that attitude, I developed an emotional connection to writing that fueled my drive to completion. In other words, I fell in love with what I was doing—the process that fueled my passion. When you connect with the process that suports your goals there is nothing you cannot achieve. 

3. Ask the right questions

The manner in which we ask questions can make all the difference in the answers we receive and the power we give to ourselves to find solutions. Perception is everything when it comes to seeking the answers that will provide life-changing, empowering results.


     Most people self-sabotage personal growth by asking the wrong questions or asking the right questions in a self-depreciating manner. Better stated, disempowering questions lead to disempowering answers and is never the right way to frame a question. Disempowering questions immediately change our subconscious thought patterns and attitudes, distorting our perception and preventing us from discovering constructive solutions. Consider the narrative that plays out in the disempowered mind...

Question: Why can’t I lose weight? Answer: Because you eat too much.
Question: Why can’t I do things right? Answer: Because you make poor choices.
Question: Why am I so broke? Answer: Because you spend more money than you make. 

     On the contrary, perceptive questions lead to insightful, empowering, and productive answers. 

Question: What are the top two things I can do, right now, to lose weight?
Question: What is a better way to accomplish this task?
Question: What are three things I can do to increase my cash flow?

     Asking the right questions the right way is empowering. The manner in which you frame your questions has everything to do with how the answer is delivered. The answers always come and are framed with the same packaging you use to request them. So, if you’re looking for empowering, insightful, constructive answers, consider framing them precisely how you expect them to be delivered.

4. Do something, but not everything

To be busy used to mean you were being productive. But that’s an outdated mindset. Sure, the argument can be made that busy people get more done than most people, but we must first clearly define the distinction between busy and driven. 

For a variety of reasons, busy people tend to take on more than they can handle. While this is seen by most as an honorable trait, it can, and often does, result in frustration. These very same busy people are also the first to tell you how much time they don’t have, using it as an excuse not to get ahead in life. While it’s good to be resilient, it is never a good idea to be so busy you start neglecting the things you need to get done to continue to lead a fulfilled life…and to reach your goals and objectives. 

     Driven people take a slightly different approach with the use of their time. They prioritize the things that must get done over other things that would be nice to get accomplished, all the while being mindful of the things that distract from what truly matters. Ironically, the majority of these people seem to be the ones taking vacations and spending time with the people that matter most in their life. So how do they find the time while most others cannot? One word: Priorities. 
     
The happiest people are busy but very much in control. They are relentless (driven) in the pursuit of their goals and have a keen sense of avoiding the distractors that are designed to keep them from achieving those goals. They do something—but not everything—every single day to bring themselves one step closer to their desired goal or objective. They realize that one small step in the right direction is better than a lot of distracted steps in the wrong direction. This approach takes a bit of understanding, patience, and tenacity. At first, it might not seem like they are getting much accomplished, but don’t be fooled. Small changes can lead to powerful shifts of momentum. Consider the power of priorities and the opposing negative effects of taking on too much at once and the choice becomes clear. 


“I may not be where I want to be, but thank God I am not where I used to be.” ~ Dr. Joyce Meyer


So where do you stand? As you look back upon your life do you find that you’re pretty much where you’ve always been? Are you ready to actually get some things done that bring you closer to the life you desire? Are you ready to break away from where you are to where you want to be? Consider adopting these four habits as a part of your life to change the results you’ve been getting to the results you desire for your best life now. Don’t just read this article and ones like it without taking the time to let the concepts and philosophies sink in. Take action to actually do something. If a real change is truly your desire, you’ll take the time to go back over each point and you’ll do something that fundamentally changes your habits and rituals. The differences are subtle, but the results are significant. 

Until next time…

~ G ~


"The person you become in the future is based on the things you do today." ~ G. Westfal

-----------------------

Stay tuned for news on the release of ... 

333
The Power of Equilibrium


Coming this fall!

***********


Check out the wise, knowledgeable, and often entertaining perspectives of Author Elisabeth Auld inside the editions of

-------------------------------------------------------------



Get your copy of Gary's first novel Dream Operative, a #1 Amazon.com Best-Seller! NOW AVAILABLE on Audible.com!


FEAR Is a Thief is on Amazon.com and NOW AVAILABLE on Audible.com too! This inspiring book is the first in a self-empowerment series that was written to help people get past fear using five fundamental truths as a basis for understanding and taking action for a better life. Get your copy today at: FEAR Is a Thief/Amazon.


Also be sure to check out: KEY HORIZON, the second novel in the G. Weston spy series. This thriller is receiving rave reviews across the spectrum and has captivated a new following of "spy-fi" readers. 




Order your copy of these exciting novels today at Amazon.com.

Sunday, July 30, 2017

The Company We Keep

@ Hugh Caracter Group
Like it or not, the company we keep says a lot about us. One of the most perplexing things for us to wrap our minds around is how much our associations affect the way we think, act, and believe. Some people become so loyal to whom they associate that they willfully sacrifice their own ambitions for the sake of friendships. This is one of the primary reasons it is so important to ally yourself with people who will empower you in the pursuit of your goals, aspirations, and ideal lifestyle.


"Surround yourself with the dreamers and the doers, the believers and thinkers, but most of all, surround yourself with those who see greatness in you, even when you don't see it yourself." Unknown

Time for a dose of tough talk so here goes...

If your friends are holding you back then it's time to get some new friends. Your associations are a critical aspect of your achievement and lifestyle objectives. If your desire is to be successful you must associate with successful people. There is simply no way around this principle. 


Take a moment to think about the five people you most associate with. Are these people the kind that inspire you, challenge you to be better, and add real value to your life? If so, great. Hang onto them. If not, it’s time for a change. 

Here’s another dose of tough talk…

Your relationships define you. If you doubt this, consider the following example. While many of us have a desire to lose weight or get into better shape, we seem to find a lot of frustration with our own “lack of progress”. If you can relate to that, consider the influence of the people you most closely associate with when it comes to just this one aspect of what defines you. Are your friends health-conscious or fitness-minded? Do they value their own health and fitness? Do they have healthy habits? How do they respond when you express your desire to get into better shape? Are they supportive? Or do they tell you that you’re just fine the way you are? Pay close attention to the way you feel when you’re around these people. If you can walk away inspired, you’re among the right friends. If you walk away drained and discouraged, consider making a change. 

There are so many examples that can be offered when it comes to the power and influence of relationships. If your desire is to live a life of financial freedom, take a good look around at your associations and you’ll quickly realize whether you’ll ever achieve that goal by the friendships you keep. Are your friends thrift-conscious, investment-minded, and high-achievers? Do they inspire you, mentor you, or encourage you? If not, you better do something about that if you ever expect to find your way to prosperity and financial independence. 

Your choice of friends may not seem to make much of a difference to you right now, but you can bet your bottom dollar it is the one clear difference-maker that will keep you stuck where you are or catapult you to new heights. So, stop spending time with people who don’t foster the mindset of who you aspire to become and go out and create new empowering friendships. It’s easier than you may think. 

Cut the ties
Changing your friendships and associations may seem overwhelming at first, but with a simple mindset and behavioral shift, you can easily make this happen. Besides, you don’t have to totally eliminate your current friends from your life. Chances are, they will drift further away as you continue to grow and make progress toward achieving your dreams, goals, and aspirations. The primary reason for this is that you will no longer be “like” them.

P.S. Don’t be so concerned about the feelings of your friends that you compromise who you aspire to become. Trust me, your friends will be just fine. 


 “Tell me who your best friends are and I will tell you who you are.” ~ G. Westfal


The longer you associate with someone, the more susceptible you are to their energy. We can all discern this energy. Think about a time when you met someone you were really drawn to. Now think about someone else who you met that affected you in a completely opposite way. Chances are, you did everything you could to shorten the visit or find the nearest exit. We are more sensitive to this energy than we give ourselves credit for. Quite often, we can discern this energy within the first seven seconds and without a word ever being spoken. It is this energy that most influences us. How we choose to respond to that influence is a difference-maker in our quest for personal growth and goal attainment. Choose wisely.

One final tip…it’s free, so give it a try. Besides, you’ll know if this applies to you or not so we won’t belabor the point.

Police your social media presence.
Friends might mean no harm in joking around, making inappropriate comments, or tagging you in photos, but if those photos don’t go along with who you are or the image you intend to project, then harm can come around and bite you when other people (potential clients or employers) see the photos and tags and begin drawing conclusions. There’s no such thing as monitoring your presence too closely. As I’ve said many times before, privacy is a thing of the past. Get over it and get on with it. The upside: the more you self-police your associations and social interactions the more control you have on the outcome of the levels you arise to. Align yourself with respected, supportive, and influential friends and watch your personal transformation begin immediately!

Until next time...

~ G ~

“Bad company ruins good morals." ~ 1 Corinthians 15:33


-----------------------

Stay tuned for news on the release of ... 

333
The Power of Equilibrium


Coming this fall!

***********


Check out the wise, knowledgeable, and often entertaining perspectives of Author Elisabeth Auld inside the editions of

-------------------------------------------------------------



Get your copy of Gary's first novel Dream Operative, a #1 Amazon.com Best-Seller! NOW AVAILABLE on Audible.com!


FEAR Is a Thief is on Amazon.com and NOW AVAILABLE on Audible.com too! This inspiring book is the first in a self-empowerment series that was written to help people get past fear using five fundamental truths as a basis for understanding and taking action for a better life. Get your copy today at: FEAR Is a Thief/Amazon.


Also be sure to check out: KEY HORIZON, the second novel in the G. Weston spy series. This thriller is receiving rave reviews across the spectrum and has captivated a new following of "spy-fi" readers. 




Order your copy of these exciting novels today at Amazon.com.