Mastering the Power of Influence

Influence is part of every interaction. Anyone refusing to admit that it’s not a part of their life is likely the one who is being influenced. Influence is so powerful that it has become a vital part of an increasing movement of personal awareness and self-improvement curriculums designed to accelerate results across the spectrum of business and personal relationships.

Your ability to persuade and influence people to help you to get the things you want out of life is one of the most important skills you can develop. Learning the fundamentals of influence opens the pathways to greater personal power that leads to your ability to get more of the things you want faster and easier than ever before. Your ability to influence can be a difference-maker between success and failure. It can virtually guarantee your progress and enable you to use all of your other skills and abilities at peak performance levels. Learning how to influence people will earn you the respect of those you interact with and has the potential to make you one of the most sought after people in your community or business.

You either have influence or you don’t. Rarely is there a middle ground on this. Having influence is the difference between being powerful and being powerless. The good news is that influence can be developed quite easily.

Most people are simply unaware that almost every human interaction involves a complex process of persuasion and influence. The unaware are, in most cases, the ones being influenced. So, it only goes to reason that the best starting point for mastering the art of influence is awareness.

Influence through Awareness

Awareness is the key to unlocking the power of most everything, especially when it comes to a better awareness of how our action (or inactions) are perceived by others. So, if awareness is the key to unlocking the power of influence, how do we go about becoming more aware?

We must begin by making conscious efforts to watch ourselves through the critical eye of others. While this may seem a difficult task at first, it is quite easy to do if we will merely get out of our own way long enough for the concept to take hold. We must begin by removing our own personal biases and becoming more consciously aware of everything, from our posture to the tone, inflection, and sincerity of our own voice. One recommended way to do that is to write one word on a piece of paper (it can be anything really: “posture”, “smile”, etc.) that serves as a reminder to a behavior we wish to change. Place that small piece of paper into your pocket to serve as a reminder to begin making the behavioral changes you need to become more aware. You will soon find that this one small act will lead to a shift in your increased awareness that, over time, will develop into a natural ability.

I have learned the power of influence over the course of my life through both trial and a lot of error. I have very often wondered why I was getting nowhere while others seemed to succeed with ease. It was only after I discovered the concept of mastering the power of influence through awareness that I began to understand that I was the one being influenced most of the time. Lucky for me, I learned the basics of this powerful life-changing concept in time to re-direct my own course in life. You can as well.

I have discovered that mastering the power of influence is a rather simple process. That’s not to say, however, that it is easy. In fact, as mentioned earlier, mastering the power of influence takes a conscious effort to understand the principles as we gradually begin to understand ourselves in the entirety of the process of human interaction. Think of the major influences on your life that have shaped the kind of person you are today. It all comes down to the kind of people you have associated with (and continue to associate with) as well as the thoughts you chose to allow into your life.

“You have the power to set the tone of your day through the choices you make and the thoughts that dominate your mind.” ~ Gary Westfal

Your increasing awareness on how others influence you goes a long way in determining whether or not it adds value to the goals and objectives you have set for your life. There is no time like the present to reassess the nature of your associations and the effect they have on you through the lens of objectivity. Be honest with yourself on how these associations are affecting you. How do they influence your thinking, your rituals, your direction, your emotions, opinions, and biases?

An honest assessment will likely reveal that there are both good and not-so-good sources of influence in your life at this very moment. Both will take you somewhere, but only one will take you where you desire to go.

Everything Matters

Attention to detail is essential if we are to develop influence to any great extent. There are as many methods as there are personality types to master the art of influence. I have discovered five powerful ways that have provided the most significant results in the least amount of time. Apply these methods to get started on mastering the art of influence in your own life, and watch closely as your influence produces refreshing new results!

Create Rapport through Mirroring

Mirroring is the subtle act of matching other people’s body language. Most people have no idea when you do this because they are focusing so intently on the content of their own message. When we mirror the body language of others we are reflecting the image and sentiment they are projecting. Body language mirroring unwittingly disarms people through the power of perception. Effective mirroring removes incongruences other people may perceive as threatening or conflicted. Mirroring creates what is referred to as the “Chameleon Effect,” a study proving that we are drawn to people who are most “like us”. This technique provides a familiar reflection of the other person, thereby allowing both parties to be drawn closer together. The closer someone perceives you to be, the more influence you have.

Mirroring is not limited to body language. Mastering the art of influence and the concept of mirroring also extends to a person’s speech patterns. Matching their pace, pitch, tone, and volume—so long as the discussion remains relevant and beneficial—goes a long way to foster effective influence.

Be Convincing

The words of your message should carry the power of your convictions. To do this, create a mental state where you genuinely believe the information you convey. This works especially well if you are sincere and have no ulterior motives aside from influencing someone to do or believe something that is in their own best interest…as well as your own. The absolute best way to be convincing and to form a genuine belief is through adequate preparation and knowledge. If it is action you wish someone to take, be prepared to demonstrate your in-depth knowledge through a convincing narrative that is rooted in knowledge and wisdom.

Project Authority

The title of this technique can easily be misleading, for authority is not to be misconstrued with dominance or a know-it-all personality. This aspect of influence goes hand-in-hand with the first point of being convincing. People have an innate tendency to listen to those who seem important or project authority. So dress and act sharp if you wish to influence others. First impressions are lasting impressions.

Leverage Yourself

Influence allows you to persuade others by using leverage. Through leverage, you learn  how to multiply yourself and get far more out of the hours you put in rather than doing it all yourself. You leverage yourself with the assistance and efforts of other people by getting them to work with you and for you in the accomplishment of your objectives that are in everyone’s best interest. In business and in life, this is also known as leadership.

Bottom Line – Be Genuine

Most people can see right through insincerity like a crystal clear window. Make this mistake and you’ll have difficulty influencing anyone for quite some time. Influence is not some game or trick we play to deceive. It is a tool to be used to help others make what you feel is the best decision.

Your ability to persuade others through influence is a personal power that will pay huge dividends. Master it and watch the results take on a new life of their own, yielding fruitful changes that will quite simply convince you of the power of this amazingly simple philosophy.

Until Next Time...

~ G ~

"You will never influence the world by trying to be like it." ~ G. Westfal

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Get your copy of Gary's first novel Dream Operative, a #1 Amazon.com Best-Seller! NOW AVAILABLE on Audible.com!

FEAR Is a Thief is on Amazon.com and NOW AVAILABLE on Audible.com too! This inspiring book is the first in a self-empowerment series that was written to help people get past fear using five fundamental truths as a basis for understanding and taking action for a better life. Get your copy today at: FEAR Is a Thief/Amazon.

Also be sure to check out: KEY HORIZON, the second novel in the G. Weston spy series. This thriller is receiving rave reviews across the spectrum and has captivated a new following of "spy-fi" readers. 

Order your copy of these exciting novels today at Amazon.com.

Rise Above Mediocrity

You want to get to the top but are often frustrated with things that keep getting in the way of your progress. No matter what you do there never seems to be enough time, money, or resources to bring about the changes you seek.
 
I'm going to share with you one of the most powerful messages I've ever discovered. It made me believe that anything is possible and that whatever success I want to achieve I indeed could achieve it. It would not be without hard work and commitment, but the concept was simple. And I instantly knew it to be true.
 
They called it a secret. In fact it was literally called "the greatest secret in the world." And that secret is this: The key to success is that you only need to be a small, measurable amount better than mediocrity to be successful.
 
Wrap your mind around that for just a second. Could that really  be true? In its simplest form, it is. You see, most people happily accept mediocrity. Oh sure, some people will tell you how much they desire to get to the top, but their actions and choices reveal an entirely different version of the words they convey. Invariably, these people give up on the meaningful things they hope to accomplish because of the mediocrity they choose to accept. I'm here to tell you it doesn't have to be that way.

OK, so how do we become better and rise above mediocrity? A good place to start is by redefining how we measure ourselves against mediocrity. The term mediocrity can be simply described as the best of the worst and the worst of the best. In other words, it is the equivalent of the status quo—a position or attitude whereby risk is avoided and comfort is essential.

If you are risk averse it doesn't mean you'll never succeed. If your goals and ambitions don't compel you to set aside comfort (or the latest TV show, video game, or distraction) for the sake of your goals it doesn't mean you're a loser. It simply means you're not ready to do what it takes to reach the top. But when you are, these aspects of life must be reconsidered in order to begin to see results.

Are you acting on your desire to reach the top, to become something more, or to achieve an objective? Are you taking action to be even slightly more than mediocre? You already intuitively know what it takes to succeed. To discover the drive within you should find out what it is you are passionate about and act upon it. Does your desire for success compel you more than your desire for acceptance and the status quo? Are you learning at least one new concept or lesson that will propel you beyond mediocrity? Are you using time wisely? How are your actions measured against what you know to be average compared to what you know to be better than average?

Are your goals and objectives clearly defined? This is very important because if you don't know where you're going you will never know when you have arrived. Worse yet, you may never get there without an accurate description of your objective or goal. Have you defined "the top" against your own desires and standards? If you're defining your goals against the standards of others then you are missing the mark and will likely fail.

Are you passionate about your goals? If so, you're well on your way to achieving them. Passion is the catalyst for action. It is the essential ingredient that will help you continue your quest to achieve despite circumstances or obstacles. Passion is what keeps people going when others quit and accept mediocrity. Find something to be passionate about and you will have discovered the secret to success and, more importantly, happiness.

Passion drives determination. Determination describes an attitude that says "I will not quit. I am more than ordinary. I will reach the top." While most people look at their circumstances and decide to retreat, those with determination courageously step forward to scale whatever obstacles they have to, right now, to reach their goals and objectives. They don't wait for "the right time" because the right time is right now!

Master the right skills. Average skills will get you to the middle. Extraordinary skills will get you to the top! Are you proficient in the skills you need to reach the top? If so, you must continue to nurture those skills. If not, you must acquire them. Seek wisdom, knowledge, and abilities that support your passion and you will become a measure better each and every day you make the effort. Your collective improvements will begin to compound and ultimately put you in a category far beyond ordinary and into one that will be extraordinary!

Last, treat people with dignity and respect. No one knows everything but everyone knows something. You cannot get to the top without the help and/or support of others. If you think otherwise, try being a jerk and see how far that gets you. Treating people with respect and dignity will pay huge dividends in winning the hearts and minds of those who may end up helping you to reach the top. We all rely on the expertise of someone who has knowledge or skills we need in order to succeed, whether that expertise comes in the form of a product or service or mentoring or consultation. Never forget that you must be able to work well with others.

You can escape the bonds of mediocrity and realize your ultimate potential if you're willing to look at things differently and begin to take small measured steps to be better today than you were yesterday. It's not as complicated as it may seem.

Until next time!

-G-

"The minute you settle for less than you deserve you get even less than what you settle for."
~ Unknown

We're proud to announce Gary's next book, set to be released this summer. FEAR is a Thief is the first in a self-empowerment series that is written to help people get past fear using five fundamental truths as a basis for understanding and taking action for a better life.

Also be sure to check out: KEY HORIZON, the second novel in the G. Weston spy series. This thriller is receiving rave reviews across the spectrum and has captivated a new following of "spy-fi" readers. 

Get your copy of Westfal's first novel Dream Operative.

Order your copy of these exciting novels today at Amazon.com.

For a comprehensive perspective on the diversity of Gary Westfal, please visit his website (www.gwestfal.com).
 
If you'd like to receive a notification anytime Gary publishes a new blog (currently about every two weeks), visit his Facebook page: G. Gary Westfal, Writer, Artist Educator.

Once there, click on "Get Update via RSS" on the bottom left of the column. You'll be subscribed and will receive a notification anytime he publishes a new blog or provides updates. Please help Gary by recommending this blog to others and by "liking" his Facebook page. Let's push this deserving author to the top among the greats where he belongs.

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You Are the Message

The amount of time it takes you to read this first sentence is all the time you have to make a first impression on someone new. Seven seconds. That's it. Time's up.

We formulate judgments and opinions of each other so fast that we rarely have time to think about the significance of our processing. Think about the last time you met someone new. How did you feel even before the other person uttered their first word? Was your initial intuition confirmed when they spoke to you or did you misjudge? Did they make eye contact with you as they approached? What did you think of their demeanor, their posture, their gestures, and the tone and delivery of their words? What judgments did you make based on their appearance? Did they "exude" a commanding presence or an unenviable timidity?

Whatever you may have been feeling as you spent those precious first seven seconds coming to your initial conclusion, something else was taking place at the very same time—You were also being analyzed.
 

Human interaction is an amazing concept of study. While most of us tend to see ourselves cast in a favorable light that others must surely see, we rarely consider the alternative perspective others really have of us. Why is that? One reason is simply based on the fact that we're so busy analyzing others that we fail to consider that we too are being analyzed. The other, more often overlooked reason is that every one of us have "hidden windows" or areas that we simply cannot see or are not yet aware of.

Based on the psychological concept of the Johari Window, the theory uses the Johari House, with four windows leading to corresponding rooms. Each room metaphorically represents a part of who we are with respect to our personality, mannerisms, and the interpersonal energy we convey to others as well as the level of awareness and insight we, and others, have upon each area.

Room 1 is that part of ourselves we see and others see.
Room 2 contains the elements that others see but we are not (yet) aware of.
Room 3 is the most mysterious room in that the subconscious part of us is seen by neither ourselves nor others.
Room 4 is our private space, which we know but keep hidden from others.

Knowing that you have areas you cannot see, for one reason or another, is significant in that you are unable to see yourself in the totality of how you are perceived by others. While you may consider yourself to be considerate and open-minded, others may see you as an arrogant know-it-all. This typically occurs when others detect a mismatch in your delivery and your words, for example. It therefore goes to show that we must continually take steps to discover the truth of who we are if we intend to project an accurate reflection of who (and how) we wish to be considered.

One of the greatest gifts we can give to ourselves is to seek, find, and apply truth in our life. Aligning ourselves with truth permits a better person to emerge from within. One of the best ways to accomplish this is through introspection—that is, being honest with ourselves about what we know and don't know. Pay careful attention to how others react when you're around. Confide in someone you can trust to give you an honest assessment of what they see that you cannot. Be careful not to overreact to the honesty of your trusted confidant and be prepared to accept the changes you must make. These changes will most likely lead to improvements you need to hear and will make it easier to cast a better impression upon yourself.

The impression you make upon others is an integral part of human interaction. The process of conveying an accurate impression is not merely limited to the words we select. While dialogue, tone and delivery are important, they are by no means the only aspects of communication that matter. We communicate with our entire being whether we care to admit it or not. We send signals or convey messages with every conceivable aspect of ourselves. Eye contact, gestures and mannerisms, posture, personal appearance—they are all considered in the amazingly fast seven-second analogy of an initial encounter.
Consider these aspects of human interaction as you look for ways to improve your chances of an accurate analysis (and a positive impression) by others when you meet for the first time:

• Optimism
• Eye Contact
• Comfort Level
• Active Listening
• Gestures
• Physical Space and Contact

These aspects are but a few of the elements that make a clear difference in how you are received, or subtlety rejected, in the First Seven Seconds. Think about the differences in the message you have been conveying against the message you wish to convey from this point forward. The time you spend making subtle changes may be worth the introspection.

Until next time!

-G-

                                                                                                                                          


Just released: KEY HORIZON the second novel in the G. Weston spy series.
Get your copy of my first novel Dream Operative.

Visit my website (www.gwestfal.com) or Amazon.com and order your copy of these exciting novels today!

If you'd like to receive a notification anytime I publish a new blog (currently about every two weeks), visit my Facebook page: G. Gary Westfal, Writer, Artist Educator

Once there, click on "Get Update via RSS" on the bottom left of the column. You'll be subscribed and will receive a notification anytime I publish a new blog or provide updates to my novel series. Please help me by recommending this blog to others and by "liking" my Facebook page.

If you enjoyed this article you can help by recommending it on Google by pressing the "g+1" button below...